Last night started as a quiet night taking some time for myself. I noticed new "likes" on Facebook and spent a good amount of time on a new post introducing myself. Even when I'm not feeling "Up" I always like to give the appearance that I am. I know from an outside perspective, you are more likely to want to interact with a happy, peppy, woman than one that is frustrated. (Like the fact that all of her effort to build a beautiful website and Facebook page felt like it was seemingly going nowhere.)
For what felt like the hundredth time, someone who was trying to help, asked me "Who is your customer?" I answered that my "customer" was women like myself- married, kids, working, trying to get through our 30s and 40s with our sanity in tact. My friend answered back that she hadn't seen posts identifying that woman, and maybe I needed to work on it.
By the way, I hate considering any of you as a "customer" If you book a question or a reading, you become my friend. We spend time together with intimate thoughts and vulnerability. We may laugh together, we may cry together- and for a little bit- we are together as friends. Don't worry, I won't expect a Christmas card from you. It's just the way I think about each person I meet through this new path I am on. We are all meant to be on this path together. There is something really exciting and also comforting about it. I love that each one of you who books a reading or a question, has chosen me to be the one to help you. I am truly honored. Even just by reading my blogs, you show me grace and allow my light to shine a little brighter, so thank you.
But, back to last night. My tribe was trying to lift me up and give me advice, and help me with "marketing" -a word I have never said more than fifty times in any given week in my life, yet has become my new buzz word. I was typing up this really witty post, with a good mix of humor and sarcasm. Then all of the sudden, my phone froze. I took a deep breath, and tried to move the screen. No luck. In what felt like slow motion, Facebook shut down and I let out a loud, guttural, scream. My kids and husband immediately ran upstairs, I'm sure expecting to see me on the ground or with an open wound. Instead, I was in tears. I started yelling at air about how "I didn't choose this" and "If I was supposed to do this, why didn't I get pushed towards a marketing class" (there's that darn word again!)
My husband just sat and listened. My kids ran up and gave me the biggest hugs; full of pure love and light for their momma who was upset about Gosh-knows-what. After awhile, I calmed down. I realized how frustrated I was in the process, and I immediately felt guilty for yelling at those who ultimately help me sense and read for you.
I went downstairs, helped the kids get ready for bed, and started the Facebook post over again. I decided to be completely honest in my frustration, and the emotional toll it had taken on me. It was far from the happy or witty typing that I had done earlier. Nonetheless, I pressed, "post" and shut my computer down. I cuddled in with my husband, and watched, "Chopped" -the show farthest away from feeling anything except possibly hunger. I let go whatever was going to happen with my post. I needed to recharge.
This was my post:
Today I wrote a blog about what an intuitive or a psychic is, and isn't. I promised you a list of things I would never do, and promised you a bunch of things I would. In return, I asked that when you book a reading with me or a question and answer, that you have an open mind, understanding, and appreciation of the sacredness that is involved.
It literally involves asking the Universe and/or God for whatever you want to know. It opens up a sacred channel, not too different than a phone line. I receive information through my conscious as a thought. I don't hear voices, I don't see anything. It's literally me and my thoughts that I convey to you. So far for "official readings" I've been in the high 90s for accuracy although as I note in the blog, an intuitive is never 100%.
For as long as I can remember, I've had this gift. It runs deep in my family line. My great-great Grandfather could heal by touch. He had a huge following and church in the late 1800s in Los Angeles. We only recently found this out, but it makes complete sense.
Growing up was scary. I couldn't decipher the words in my head, nor who was saying them. I thought I was crazy for a long, long, time. But, slowly but surely I started reading for friends and family. I chatted with relatives that had passed, I helped my friends navigate relationships and work through past pain. I enjoyed helping others in this way. In my circles, it wasn't a secret. It just "was" and I felt safe in knowing I only would use it around those who were open to the idea.
Creating this website a mere two weeks ago, allowed me to be open in my abilities and also expand my reach helping others. I've had a few people ask me why I'm charging for my services, and I want to explain why I do.
As I state in my blog, I don't need the money. However, by you booking a reading or a question from me, you are showing me that you have respect for my time as well as the emotional toll that it takes on me when I read someone. Just because I answer your question doesn't mean I am done, emotionally. Hard, sad, questions will stick with me, often for the rest of the day if not longer. Empathetically, this takes me away from my family and it is hard to bring myself back in.
I also will check in with you a few days later, asking how you are doing and if you have any thoughts on what was conveyed.
Above all though, this is a direct line of communication with a higher power. I'm not God, nor will I ever, ever, pretend to be. However you are asking for a direct communication line in. To not charge on a routine basis is insulting to the very idea of being psychic. I understand the need for people to have "proof" that I am real. But, we must understand the need for faith and also trust in the Universe. If you have both, I will be able to read you. If you have neither, I couldn't help you even if I wanted to.
I ask you to share this page because I believe that right now we are at a time where we deeply need to know the Universe is watching over us. So many people are hurting emotionally. We need to be reminded that there is light in all of us. Sometimes just that reminder in itself is enough to let it shine, again.
I (obviously) have no background in marketing. I never in my life thought I would have a business, and I (admittedly) failed accounting in college.
Tonight I got really frustrated at the Universe. I had written a beautiful post introducing myself to the new followers of this page, it was the perfect blend of jokes and serious facts about myself. I was ON. But, then Facebook crashed and I screamed so loud my husband and kids ran upstairs to see what had happened. I started screaming at thin air, "If I was supposed to do this, why didn't you lead me to a marketing class!!!!" I then yelled at my aunt (who passed on 7 years ago) Why she hadn't done this in her life, and "why did I have to be the one to do it?" to which I heard an immediate response in my head, but I closed my eyes. My husband, unabashed at me screaming at mid air, just listened.
The thing is, folks- this is hard. Being psychic in itself is hard, but trying to reach out with the best intentions is even harder.
I am human. I make mistakes. I scream, I yell. I get mad at thin air. I fight tooth and nail when I see life leading me in a direction that seems fraught with difficulty.
But, as my dear sister reminded me on the phone tonight, those who have been down the hard road are able to lead others to safety. I'm not trying to reinvent the wheel. I'm just trying to help people.
So, with all of this being said, if you think people would be interested in a question with the Universe, or if you know someone who is dearly missing a loved one that has passed over, share this page with them. Even if you know someone that loves the idea of it, I'd love to have them on this page. This page is for all of us. We are stronger when our lights are shining together, and that's what I hope to build on this page- a wave of light that will lead others that are in need.
This isn't amount money. This is about hope. This is about faith. This is about letting go of past crap and being your best self. This is about yelling out loud at air, knowing that there are people around us unseen that get it- and don't hold our meltdowns against us.
I write a blog almost every day. A lot of times it comes directly from the Universe. It sounds really crazy to say so, but if you're on this page, you're more apt to believe me I suppose. Start reading my blog, and comment! I love feedback!
If I haven't had the pleasure of becoming your friend yet, my name is Nancy. I'm a hot mess but I'm also psychic. I love the Bachelor, rescuing animals (especially when my husband isn't home) and I sing karaoke on Facebook stories when I drink wine. I'm a native Californian and serve on the RTM in my local community. (For you non-New Englanders that's "Representative Town Meeting" -don't worry, I had to look it up the first few times, too.)
If you're actually still reading this long post, thank you for listening. I promise I'm generally not this verbose, but yelling at thin air will do that to me. Share, comment, let me know what you think. Above all, thank you for being here and sharing in this journey.
This morning I woke up to a Facebook message from someone I didn't know, but happened to be a Facebook friend (we all have those Facebook "friends") She had been off Facebook a long time, but decided to hop on. She "happened" to see my post. Once she read it, she decided to read my blogs, which then lead to her messaging me. Something had "lead her" to getting on Facebook last night. She told me.
Literally as I am typing up this blog she messaged me back. Something extraordinary just took place, something that only can be explained by things happening the way they are supposed to, in the time they are supposed to.
If I had posted that other post I was typing before Facebook crashed, it would have gotten a few laughs and a few likes. It might have brought a few more people to my page- maybe I even would have hit "100 Likes" on my page. Instead, I had a meltdown, yelled at air, apologized to air, posted something vulnerable, and let it go. All of the while the Universe was working in it's own way. I needed to voice the feeling of frustration last night. I needed to cry. Somewhere not too far away, someone that I barely knew was searching for a light. It turned out to be my own.
At this moment, I feel a type of blessing and humbleness I cannot begin to describe. I wish I could share what just happened between my new friend and I, but I have a feeling the magic in her life is just getting started. Love and hope is filling her up right now, and I can only stand on the sidelines and smile as I watch my new friend with the simplest acts of kindness.
There are no coincidences. Nothing happens that the Universe doesn't have a say in. Even times where we think we have screwed up, the Universe reminds us that there are no screw ups. Even that burned pan of marinara sauce is meant to happen and for you to learn from.
What are you going to learn from the Universe today? What mistakes have you made that have turned into blessings?
Allow the sun to shine on you, and allow hope and love enter your soul. We are all deserving of light. Believe that you are deserving of yours. Keep your eyes open for coincidences, my friends. They are simply the Universe waving it's hands and saying, "I'm here."