"V - Turn thy power outward, not inward, for therein shines the Light and the Way."
-5th tenant of Novus Spiritus, (Gnostic Christan belief.) 1
Over the weekend I quite suddenly found myself thrust into an intuitive party and an in-person reading. The last couple of weeks have been like this: I have no one booked and all of a sudden, BAM! Messages come in asking if I am free. It coincidentally (?) also generally happens when I start wondering if I am not connecting with people enough to book readings and if I am little more than a party trick.
The Universe is funny like that.
This weekend was different, though. I spent some time with someone who I've had on my mind since I started one-question.net. I knew I was meant to connect with her, yet I somehow waited until she contacted me a month or so in to tell her that. I had read for her a couple of weeks ago, and this was the first party she was hosting. After everyone had left, we sat and talked. I relayed my frustrations and my vulnerability with her in a way I hadn't been able to express before. In turn, she comforted me and offered a shoulder to rest my worries (and my head ) for a while. I left having a renewed sense of belief in myself and my abilities. But, the Universe wasn't done with me yet.
The next morning at church, I received a message from my Facebook page. Ordinarily, I wouldn't answer during church, but something drew me to respond. The woman who sent the message asked if I could meet her to do an in-person reading a couple of hours later. I looked over at my kids and my husband and hesitated to take away from family time. I discussed it with my husband, who (as usual) supported me going out. I agreed, and I soon found myself alone in the sun by the water, waiting for my client. It wasn't a spot I had met anyone for a reading before- but I couldn't resist meeting along the shoreline on one of the most beautiful days of the year so far.
Soon my client came, and I immediately felt her hesitancy. We started walking along the water, and I began to understand why she had asked to see me so soon. It wasn't what she was saying; it was what she wasn't saying. She was presenting me with a mask I was all too familiar with wearing, and I knew it was time to pull the mask off. I called her out on it, and immediately she looked like she had been slapped. The Universe (God) continued to feed me information, and I continued, challenging the face she was showing me. Her eyes glazed over and she looked out across the water. Instead of resisting, she gave in to my words, and I could feel her mask dissolving right before my eyes. By the end of the reading, she exuded a light that I hadn't seen when she first met me. She smiled, and she looked lighter. I said my good-byes, and as I walked away, I knew I was right where I was supposed to be on that beautiful Sunday.
Once again, I thought I was done, but over the course of the next 24 hours, I continued to talk to my client (now turned friend) as the weight she had been carrying continued to lessen. The Universe was still working, and I could only oblige.
This morning, another incident where I happened to be at the right place at the right time for someone that needed words from God. I happened to be open to receiving words for her, yet the fact that I was open enough in the first place is uncanny considering the situation.
It is easy to feel frustrated by where we see ourselves on our journey. When we are unsatisfied instead of moving forward, we get stuck on the path. We fight the diversion in front of us and dig a deeper hole around it instead of easily maneuvering around.
It's like my new rescue dog, Abbey K. We let her outside on a long tether and a lot of times she gets stuck and wraps the long tether around a tree or a post. Instead of barking to let us know she is trapped and waiting for me to get her, she starts digging a hole. By the time I get outside to get her, sometimes she has various holes all around her.
Do you ever find yourself digging a hole in your life, only to go and dig another one just as bad? It's the same thing. You're stuck. Instead of trusting that the Universe will guide you around, you think you can control the situation, and you dig holes full of control, worry, and anxiety. When you've gone down one rabbit hole, you start down another.
The Universe can't help you if you are trying to control the situation.
The only way out? Allow God to work in your life. Trust your gut instinct, and always follow the "coincidences."
Nothing just "happens." God is ALWAYS in charge.
This weekend I re-learned the idea that by turning ourselves outward, not inward- we find our way. I felt stuck because I was focused on myself and my emotions. I wanted to help people, and I didn't understand what the Universe was doing having me sit around. It turned out, I needed to be "sitting around," so when the call for help came, I could answer it freely. If I had been working with other clients and had other appointments, I wouldn't have been able to meet the needs of the people that needed me this past weekend.
Today, focus on those around you. What can you do to help your spouse? Your kids? What can you do to spread your light? It could be as simple as letting someone in when you are sitting in traffic or smiling at the person next to you. Whatever it is- when you feel the inclination to help someone- DO IT. Don't assume that the person behind you in traffic will let the other car in, or that your husband is snarling at you because he's a jerk. (He might be, but why is he being a jerk? Show him some love and patience instead.)
Above all, turn your light outward, and trust that the Universe will show you the way. I promise you, it will. You have to stop digging holes and trust.